The years after that

After a very ruff start my wife and I got a little better at being married. I still lied, and still had my addictions, but more time passed between incidents. I was slowly breaking my addictions. Each time I would revert to the old husband ways it would hurt my wife so much. I was so hurtful to her and very disrespectful. What I did not know or understand was that I was loosing credibility with her each time I relapsed. After a while the housing crisis began and we were one of the first to lose our house. We should have never been a loud to get a loan in the first place. My wife did what came naturally and went home. I tried to hang in there to patch it up, but I was soon missing her so badly I just had to leave. I quit my job packed my stuff and went after her. We were about to start life over. Through all this I did not know my wives level of love for me or if she loved me at all. She hung in there with me and I often wonder if she did so more out of habit than for love. We lived with my parents for a while and paid off debt. Then we made our next major mistake. We bought a cheap house that would never sell and tried to put the pieces back together. Flash forward to present date. My wife has an awesome job. I have a lame job, but hope to get a much better job real soon. Were still in the house from hell. And we have two beautiful kids. Only problem is my wives new job maybe advanced her mind way beyond mine and has set her down a different path than me. She works with high tech people who are trendy and very cool and she looks up to them and is impressed with them. I'm not very impressive anymore and am pretty much lame to her. Were still together. No papers yet. I intend to have her love me again. I hope she can find new love for me greater than the first. From here on I will forget the past and focus on the our future marriage.